3 Questions to Help You Decide

As you think about the new year and reflect on where you stand personally and professionally at this stage of your life, how do you feel you’re doing? On a scale of 1 – 10 how would you rate yourself when it comes to: personal and professional goal achievement; work and career fulfillment; family life; relationships / social life; spiritual growth; community impact; optimal health and fitness; financial peace of mind? What areas need the most improvement? What do you need to change to get on track? Are you doing the same things over and over but expecting a different result? If you’re frustrated with how things are going as you rate yourself and not sure what to do about it, the best next step might be to consider hiring a coach to help you make this the best year ever.

Here are 3 questions to help you decide:

1. What do I really want, when do I want it and what am I willing to do to get it?

One of the things we all know about successful people is that they have goals. But don’t make the mistake of thinking those goals should just be about your job or career. The people I’ve most admired in my life have goals that go well beyond their work and material possessions to include areas like family, faith, fitness, friendships, causes etc…And they know their “why” not just the “what”. Its vital you set goals that are deeply personal and meaningful to you (as opposed to those just based on the expectations of others) because that’s essential to leading a balanced, truly rewarding life. If we don’t take ownership of our own goals in all these areas, we begin to ask ourselves “what’s the point?” leading to burnout. And that can feel very demotivating and dis-empowering. Working with an experienced coach to identify and explore your most meaningful goals to achieve real clarity in your life can lead to lasting breakthroughs in thinking and results.

When you think about a goal you really want to achieve, how are you feeling about the pace of your progress? Are you wasting time trying to hit the goal by “reinventing the wheel”? What is your time worth or better yet what do you want it to be worth? Would you prefer to get results faster? One of the most compelling benefits of working with the right coach is help developing the right strategies to get you moving in the right direction quicker to accelerate your progress.  

How badly do you want a particular goal? Its important you have some emotional intensity behind the goals you pick because you’ll need it when you encounter the inevitable obstacles along the way. My favorite quote on this subject comes from Winston Churchill: “success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm”. Having a coach by your side to keep you focused and motivated can make all the difference as you persevere to do what needs to be done without excuses.

2. What is preventing me from getting the results I want?

We all have “blind spots” when it comes to our own lives and the problems we face. Just like there are patterns of behavior that lead to success, there are also patterns of behavior that can assure our failure. Are you aware of all the threats to your success? You don’t have to go it alone! Working with a coach one on one can bring perspective and objectivity which can dramatically improve results. Over the years I’ve worked with coaching clients who unknowingly had developed habits of sabotaging success in various situations in ways they had never even considered. Once they gained that awareness, they suddenly had the breakthrough they needed. After all, we don’t know what we don’t know, right?

Some people aren’t getting the results they want because of a reluctance to invest in their own personal and professional development. There is a reason many top performers use coaches – because it works. But like other things worth having, those results come with a price requiring an investment of your time and money. The good news is that from my experience when someone invests in coaching, that act of commitment in and of itself can serve as the catalyst to get you going. Having more “skin in the game” may be just what you need.

3. How can I go from knowing what to do to actually doing it consistently?

Have you ever learned something new at a conference; gotten some valuable advice from a peer; or read a great book chock full of new ideas but never actually implemented any of it? If you said yes, trust me you’re not alone. Its one thing to “know” what to do but another to take action. The big missing piece for many people is having a real accountability partner to increase the odds of following through. Why do people hire personal trainers? For many its more than just being shown what exercises to do and how to do them correctly. The fact is that its easier to follow through and actually do what we need to do consistently when we feel accountable to something or someone. I’ve had coaching clients confess to me: “Bob, some weeks its just knowing we have our scheduled coaching call coming up that gets me to make that prospect call I know I need to make.” Have you been guilty of “talking a big game” about what you need to change but find yourself not following through? The answer may be hiring a coach to bring that critical element of accountability. Remember: even the best action plan is meaningless if there is no actual action taken.

One on one coaching isn’t for everyone but if you’re serious about your success it could be just the thing to make this your best year ever.

Bob David – Business and Life Coach

[email protected]

For more information and videos about Bob’s business and life coaching services and book “The Undaunted Life: How to Succeed No Matter What”, please visit www.bobdavidlive.com or contact Bob directly via email at [email protected] or via phone at 804-719-9046

3 Questions to Help You Decide…

Investment Industry Tom Dorsey Interviews Advisor Coach Bob David

Have you ever gone through a period of feeling weak, uncertain, worried or doubtful about your career, business or personal life? If so, then you know how debilitating that can feel. Its that sense of hesitation, vacillation, floating along without clear purpose or confidence in a particular direction or course of action. If we’re not careful an insidious form of helplessness can set in that stifles initiative and creativity, lowers our future expectations and discourages us from taking needed action.

In contrast, we all know how good it feels to have unshakable confidence in what we’re doing and our future. Its the same for the economy and in the world of business. If you think about it, everything in business is based on confidence or a lack of it. When we are confident, we buy and invest, but when we aren’t we don’t. And regardless of ones political affiliation, its hard not to feel a real positive, palpable, seismic shift and surge in economic / business confidence since Donald Trump won the election.

In all due respect and deference to how recent protestors may feel about the man and angst about specific policy changes, its hard to deny the power of “animal spirits” pushing the Dow Jones past 20k to all time highs and a resurgent sense of business confidence rising across the economy. And that confidence is contagious. In fact, I don;t know about you but lately, I have to admit that every day when I wake up and turn on the news to see swift, decisive change and action taking place with our new President, I find myself feeling more energized and emboldened.

And its been a reminder for me that when we go from feeling like lambs in life to feeling more like lions – it feels good, damn good, and thats a good thing!

And here are 3 things you can do starting today to feel less like a lamb and more like a lion:

1. Break glass. What I mean by that is stop over analyzing everything and take bold, decisive action instead. Most of us have a tendency to over think things and as a result procrastinate. Don’t let “perfect” get in the way of “good enough”. Wake up and realize that the biggest mistake is not making one. Get moving and do something. Many people float along not realizing that if you are not setting goals and taking proactive steps to reach those goals, you will become the ultimate “Lamb”….a sacrifice for somebody else or something else that did have goals and took action. In my coaching work, I often find people who are stuck in a rut or struggling to break out of a plateau. They give counsel to fears and doubts. Take a clue from the most successful leaders and make a move – to hell with the critics.
2. Major in the majors. This recent surge in business and market confidence is a reminder that the business of America is business! And at the end of the day, as Bill Clinton once famously declared back in his 1992 presidential campaign “its the economy stupid”. When our jobs, careers and finances are moving in the right direction, its amazing how so many good things can flow from that….including better physical, psychological , emotional and financial health. Even our relationships improve. Have you heard the statistics that many divorces are caused by financial angst? I’m not advocating working all the time without the right work/life balance but when you follow this President’s lead and “get down to business”, a lot of good things can happen.

3. Don’t stop. Keep it up. Inevitably our new president’s frenetic pace will ebb as the reality of the “sausage making” mechanism of democracy sets in but the key to achieving anything is not giving up until the job is done. Make sure you are a finisher. Its not enough to get started and stay focused….you also have to take consistent action towards your goals to have any real chance of achieving them. It was good to see the bust of Winston Churchill return to the Oval Office. I once read a great biography of Churchill called “The Last Lion” written by William Manchester. It should serve as a reminder of what he famously said in a speech: “never give up, never ever give up.”

Its time to stop “baaaaing” and start roaring!

Fall is my favorite time of year here in Virginia for lots of reasons…the arrival of cooler temperatures, colorful leafs on the trees and of course football season. One of my fondest fall memories was playing football for Coach Dick Sheridan at undersized Furman University back in the 80’s when we celebrated major upset victories “David vs. Goliath” style over much larger, better equipped school competitors such as University of South Carolina, Georgia Tech and N.C. State. This past weekend when I saw Furman give a scare to #12 ranked Michigan State then University of Richmond decisively beat the bigger University of Virginia on their home turf in Charlottesville and my home town team University of Georgian best UNC, I was reminded of just how exhilarating it is to experience a win if you are playing for the right team. But unfortunately, in business and in life we can’t always be on the winning team. And though winning will always feel better than losing, sometimes that taste of bitter defeat can plant the seed for something positive down the road if you are smart about how you respond after being knocked down. Have you had the experience lately of having an expected win turn into a loss?

Case in point: I just found out my coaching firm didn’t “win” a team coaching engagement after making it to the “final two”. After feeling the high of being close to the goal line only to somehow “fumble”, I felt crushed under a wave of disappointment and “second guessing”. But then I picked myself back up, went back to the sidelines and began the process of learning from the experience so I can better compete next time I’m back on the field. And this meant I had to “practice what I preach” in my coaching engagements as painful as that is because one of my core beliefs is simply this: The next best thing to winning….is losing.

Here are three reasons why:

Must put loss in context: Its been said that “nobody remembers the loser of the Super Bowl”. Just look at NFC Champion Carolina Panthers who in spite of losing the “big one” against the Denver Broncos, had an amazing season- pundits be damned. As much as i could be flogging myself right now for losing a team coaching engagement I competed for, the fact is my firm beat out numerous other firms just to make it to the finals which is a much better result than had I not been in the running at all, right? That gives me a better, more realistic context within which to work and move forward. Are you being too hard on yourself after experiencing a defeat in business or in your life? Are you still on the ground after getting sacked?

Failure is essential to success: Have you gone through a time consuming, arduous screening and interviewing process with a new prospect only to lose the business in the end? I know exactly how that feels. In my firm’s situation, it began by being one of five “pre-screened” recommended coaching firms out of dozens. Then there was the initial interview followed by more follow up interviews. There were references provided and grilled. Then there was the drafting and presenting of a proposal tailored to their needs. And then there was the dreaded “waiting game”. The emotional roller coaster from this process can be brutal even for the most seasoned veteran. Yet we tend to ignore all the valuable feedback we can get from the process. For example, this team was kind enough to share the reasons why my firm was not selected. And as painful as that was to hear, it was absolutely essential to improve my services and how they are packaged and presented. Are you asking for feedback to improve when you don’t get the business? Remember what legendary Coach John Wooden said: “Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be”.

Focus on future and take action now: after a loss do you find yourself hosting a “pity party” and making excuses? Can you imagine what would happen if a football coach allowed his team to wallow in self pity after losing the season opener? These are toxic habits that can be the “kiss of death” for anyone choosing to indulge, leading to stagnation and loss of momentum. One of the things we all should do is as quickly as possible is to: assess the takeaways from a losing experience; focus on how we can make immediate improvements ; take immediate action. For a football coach that means adjusting personnel or the playbook or both. On the political front its been interesting to watch how Trump has been slowly creeping back up in the polls after it appeared Hillary was on a clear glide path to win the Whitehouse. It appears Trump’s attempts to change course by hiring new campaign management and “softening” his tone may be paying off. Only time will tell but one thing’s for sure: if he had not changed course its likely his loss would be a fait accompli come November. Now lets see what happens in the debates…..

For me, based on the feedback received, I’ve already determined the specific areas I need to tweak / emphasize in my next presentation. And to make sure this doesn’t get me bogged down, I’m reaching out to several new prospects to re-fill my pipeline not next week but today. Remember that whatever you focus on grows in your experience so its vital to put all your efforts and energy into future efforts rather than spending too much time in the “film room” of life reliving “bad games” over and over somehow hoping to change the past. The rest of your “season” is still ahead. Get back on the field and be ready for the next game!

Coach Bob David

Have you noticed the slow, creepy shift happening with the next generation away from the virtues of business competition, hard work and free market capitalism towards a culture of entitlement, “participation trophies” and socialism?

In my speaking, coaching and consulting engagements, I know that words and their meaning matter. And though the saying “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” might hold true physically on the playground, I don’t think that’s true culturally. In particular there are two specific words impacting some core beliefs underpinning our free market capitalist system that I believe provide us anecdotal evidence of this “culture shift”. So what are the two words?

1. “Salesy”– In my coaching work with newer financial advisors especially I often find that their biggest obstacle to success is their fear of appearing “salesy” in the eyes of prospects when implementing a new client acquisition strategy. On one hand I can totally understand where that comes from as we’ve all had the experience of being around a “back slapping”, “hand shaking”, obnoxious loud mouth, trying to sell us something we don’t need or want and making us feel super uncomfortable. But on the other hand lets all be real clear here about something so obvious and fundamental that maybe the next generation is not being shown the light. Nothing and I mean nothing happens in the world of business unless somebody sells something to somebody else ok? I don’t care what line of work you are in either. Everyone and I mean everyone is in “sales” in some form or fashion whether they realize it or not. For example, a physician would likely cringe if you claimed they were in sales but then watch them turn right around and “sell” you on their expertise and/or treatment plan. A CPA would most surely balk at the label “salesperson” but must convince you on their ability to provide their tax preparation services. Even a receptionist is “selling” your firm’s services indirectly. So let me suggest that its fine to want to avoid appearing “salesy” but please don’t avoid approaching someone about your services using your fear of appearing “salesy” as an excuse – not going to fly with this coach. Do you need to accelerate revenue growth? Are you working to improve your “sales skills”? Have you considered hiring a coach to help a new member of your team shift their core beliefs around selling your services so they become comfortable and confident approaching prospects?
2. “Socialist”- When Bernie Sanders started winning primaries I was “feeling the burn” alright but not because I liked him, but because his message about socialism literally gave me heartburn! Are you like me and found it alarming that so many young voters were falling for this fantasy of everybody getting free stuff with no concept of paying the bill? When did socialism become so “hip”? Have we totally forgotten the lessons of history? Can anyone name even one successful socialist society? Are we teaching our kids how we won the cold war with the biggest socialist in world history the Soviet Union and what happened to the Berlin Wall? And please lets agree not to pull out Sweden as the poster child of socialism working. When you peel back the veneer there you quickly realize they are basically living off the hard work of previous generations and their current economic system is untenable long term. My favorite question to ask a socialist is “how much do you deserve to get from someone else who earned it?”. I’m becoming convinced that part of our problem is we’re not properly educating the next generation on why free market capitalism, while not perfect, is the best system for peace and prosperity. Unfortunately it seems that the term “capitalism” has become a pejorative term since the “great recession” of 2008 . I see this with newer financial advisors who have a since of entitlement when joining established teams at investment firms and expect to be “given” clients without prospecting. Basically they buy into the fantasy that they deserve to inherit clients that someone else put in the hard work to acquire and service. If you want a good read on this subject, Ive heard good things about a new book recently published called “The Problem with Socialism” by Tom DiLorenzo and I intend to pick up a copy to read myself. Imagine a world without “sales”, without incentive, without competition, without free enterprise….its a pretty scary picture. We should be teaching the next generation that egalitarianism (a socialists best friend) where we guarantee equal outcomes for all regardless of effort is the surest path to poverty and result in a “race to the bottom”. Are you warning your kids about the real dangers of the socialist mind set? Its not going to feel so “hip” when we all wake up and realize there really is no free lunch after all and our nation is bankrupt. Are you challenging educators in your community to teach the virtues of a free market capitalistic system?

Be proud and stand up for our free market capitalist system which rewards “sales” and promotes the power and true meaning of other words like “excellence” and “competition” as the surest path to lasting freedom and prosperity. And don’t let any “salesly” politician try to convince you otherwise!

Bob David www.bobdavidlive.com

Did you hear that loud noise coming from across the pond after the Brexit vote?
Like the culturally iconic Woodstock concert of the 60s, this event likely portends a summer of lots of background noise full of love for clash, trash and even cash for everyone within earshot.

Time to “clash” : Just when you thought fomenting issues like a shrinking middle class, income inequality, anti-globalism and crony capitalism (which spawned a populist revolt visa vie the rise of candidates Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump) were limited to Americans, here comes the Brits onto the world stage voicing a similar clash of cultures and a shake up of the status quo. Like Mick Jagger of The Rolling Stones, the UK people told the EU “hey you, get off of my cloud”. And like Jimmy Hendrix we are all now feeling the “Purple Haze” economically and politically as a result. But all is not lost….we all should just take a “chill pill” this summer until this all blows over. If history is any guide, this “crises de jour” will present new opportunities and toxic overreactions should be avoided. After all, even most Woodstock attendees survived right?

Now lets talk “trash”: Have you ever seen such vitriol and finger pointing among those that disagree with the course of our political and economic futures? Pundits are predicting both the Democratic and Republican conventions this summer will usher in a new low of mud slinging and “trash talking” the likes of which we’ve never seen. But again history can serve as a guide here. If you’ve watched the recent HBO special “All the Way” about former President LBJ, you know how the TV commercial in the 1964 election cycle showing the little girl picking a daisy with a backdrop of a nuclear mushroom cloud scared the electorate away from republican nominee Barry Goldwater. Then in the next election cycle we saw the 1968 riots at the Democratic National Convention which lead to Richard Nixon’s Republican party victory. The point is that we’ve been in this trash dumpster before and somehow we came out the other side smelling like a …well maybe not like a rose but also not like the hippie who didn’t shower for days at Woodstock!

And as for “cash:” There is an old axiom in the investment world that says “cash is trash”. The rationale goes that because purchasing power is lost over time to inflation and rising prices, keeping money in a mattress actually loses money and thus really “stinks” if left sitting around. But this summer could well be an exception to the rule here but not because of what you may initially think. History is pretty clear here about the negative consequences of keeping too much cash uninvested for too long. But this summer is a reminder that having a love for an emergency stash of cash to bail you out of trouble or take advantage of opportunities makes a lot of sense. Most Americans are spread so thin financially that a summer of love for cash could just be what the financial doctor ordered. Are you saving enough regularly to cover unexpected emergencies? Do you have at least 5 or 10% of your investment portfolio in cash to take advantage of summer bargains created by this Brexit or Presidential election year uncertainties?

Do yourself and your family a favor and enjoy your summer in spite of all the political and economic news headlines. Remember a pearl of wisdom former President Bill Clinton famously shared with us back in the roaring 90s and whatever you do, make sure many years from now you can look back on this summer and plausibly claim “I didn’t inhale”.

Advisors who may be tempted to “sell in May then go away” for the summer might want to reconsider that strategy given what’s happened this crazy Presidential election year so far and focus instead on aggressively prospecting and managing expectations  like leading candidates  Trump and Hillary are being forced to do. Consider the daunting challenges faced by both candidates and Advisors alike:

• “Lesser of two evils”:  Just what does it feel like to be a recent retiree when interest rates are still at record lows and the stock market is still near record highs?  What does it feel like to be an advisor guiding clients in this kind of precarious environment for investors? My guess is its the same way voters are feeling right now with the two leading candidates who’s “unfavorable” ratings are at record highs. Its a feeling that either way we go investment wise I’m going to have to “hold my nose” and try to select the “lesser of two evils”. This lack of enthusiasm for existing choices means Advisors must attempt the unenviable task of properly managing client expectations while justifying their fees. This means “retail campaigning” one client review meeting at a time. Clients may still not be happy with their choices but at least you were there showing you cared. Can everyone remember when former President Bill Clinton famously said in that televised town hall “I can feel your pain”. As it turned out, that made all the difference.
• “Expand your tent”: There is a raging battle between candidates for newer voters and young people in general. The same can be said for Advisors who have aging clients. The statistics are pretty grim when it comes to retaining assets after a client passes. Have you developed and implemented a strategy to connect with the next generation to improve the odds of retaining those assets? How may new ideal client relationships have you brought in so far this year? This summer would be the perfect time to expand your tent.
• “Control the news cycle”: One of the things we hear has been the key to Trump’s success so far is his ability to control the daily news cycle and get his message across. Advisors can take a cue here and make sure clients are getting properly informed. When is the last time you offered an educational seminar designed to educate clients and prospects around a topic of interest? If you aren’t providing it rest assured clients are getting it somewhere else. I coached a team once who initially was very resistant to offering educational seminars to their clients. They insisted that because they did one on one reviews there was no need. But then they got a surprise ACAT from one of their top clients who as it turned out went to a social security seminar offered by a competitor.

The bottom line is advisors can learn some lessons this summer from the political process as clients  “vote” with their assets….

Bob David